For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.

Genesis 2:24 (NASB)

When companies want great transformations, they spend a lot of time in planning and marketing the change. They write mission statements and strategy documents running into hundreds of pages to attempt to define and communicate the intent. In Genesis 2:24 God presents His mission statement and the key steps of His plan for Marriage in this one verse. This is the plan and the Bible is the strategy manual that transforms couples as they progress through the key stages of their relationship.

God’s purpose was sealed by Jesus when he confirmed Genesis 2:24. Jewish religious leaders were stating their rights under the law of Moses to divorce their wife, and this is how Jesus responded:

But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

Mark 10:5-9 (NASB)

The Steps on the Journey:

The mission is ‘Oneness’ and the steps are:

• To Leave

• Be Joined

• Become One

Leaving marks the start of the journey and Becoming One the fulfillment of God’s plan. If we look at Genesis 2:24 from a purely physical viewpoint, it may appear that the verse marks steps through the marriage ceremony that are fulfilled at the start of the marital relationship:

• Leaving the family home or family authority

• Making a marriage contract and

• Consummating the marriage in physical intimacy

The truth however is rather more. Instructions in God’s Word concerning marriage, and the qualities and characteristics we should display as husbands and wives reveals how this journey is a process that will take time.* It demands far more than the events of the wedding day.

Marriage requires growth. Mutual sharing, a love that grows beyond feeling and emotion - a love that is without condition. It requires devotion and personal sacrifice. These are qualities that develop with desire, and a willingness to be changed. Becoming One requires a level of love and intimacy that mirrors that which Christ has for His people. This is exactly what God wants of you, to imitate the love of Christ in your relationship with each other.*

Now you are talking the impossible:

If it were not possible, we would not be asked to do it in God’s Word. Christian couples and Non-Christian couples have created marriages that last a lifetime and reflect the quality of unconditional love. God is able to help every couple that desires to honour His Word and each other by keeping the promises they make in the marriage contract. Nothing is impossible with God.

Reasons why people get married:

How challenging the journey through marriage becomes may be influenced by many things and every marriage journey has unique circumstances and experiences. We have been surprised at times to discover some of the reasons people give for getting married. These range from ‘overwhelming love’ to ‘peer pressure’. Your reason for marriage may shape the nature of some of the challenges on the journey, but everyone who desires it and every couple prepared to work to achieve it can have an amazing marriage.

The first step:

Leaving is the first step in this marriage journey. Every step is progressive and that means each step is dependent on the one preceding it. You have to learn to Leave before you can truly begin to bond together or Be joined. This is a truly critical step and the one many marriages fail to negotiate. But what is involved in the leaving process? Watch for our next teaching. It will challenge you whether you are young or old married or single, Christian or non-Christian.

Our next teaching article on the topic of Leaving:

'‘An opportunity for self destruction” is coming soon.

*Some references you may find useful. We would recommend the Passion Translation:

(Ephesians 5:20-31; Proverbs 19:14; 1 Peter 3:1, 7; Proverbs 31:10-31)

Steve and Khanya